Nordstrom Anniversary Sale
As you know, the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale is my most favorite sale of the year. Brand-spanking-new fall items on sale in the middle of summer. And also necessities, like undershirts for Chris, the next size up in a winter coat for Charlotte (which gets handed down to Lorelei), and so on.
This was my conversation with Chris yesterday:
Me: The early-access Nordstrom Anniversary Sale starts in 7 hours!
Chris [groaning]: What do you need to shop for?
Me: Um, booties, for starters, because apparently that trend is sticking around.
Chris: But you HAVE a nice booty.
Me: Har har. And jeans. I need jeans.
Chris: Don't you already HAVE jeans?
[I glare coldly at his uncomprehending face.]
Me: Yes. I do. I have lots of jeans. I also have had two children in the past 5 years, and my waist and ass have swelled and shrunk and swelled and shrunk, hitting many sizes in between, during which I bought cheapo temporary jeans so I could, like, be fully dressed and stuff. Now that I am DONE having your children, I'm feeling pretty confident that I can invest in a nice pair of jeans without the risk of them not fitting next year.
Chris: ---
Me: Furthermore, the last time I bought a NICE [read: potentially overpriced] pair of jeans was 3 years ago, when I was back to my normal size, in between creating Charlotte and Lorelei.
Chris: ---
Me: Also, the jeans I wear very, very often? They're from high school. HIGH. SCHOOL. Which, best case scenario, was 15 years ago. Alas, they're getting a little thin, which one would expect from 15+ years of wear, and the hems are totally frayed.
Chris: ---
Me: Now, shall we count YOUR jeans? Hmmm?
Chris: Um, no. That's okay.
Me: So, then. Seeing as how the last GOOD jeans I bought occurred 3 years ago at the anniversary sale, I'm feeling pretty darn justified in buying new ones for $60 off. I PLAN for this sale, mister.
Chris: But . . .
Me: And bras. I have been scraping by for a year, because you could not believe the cost of three new ones AT THE ANNIVERSARY PRICES last year, when I had finished nursing Lorelei and did not own a single one that fit. NOT ONE. And I had waited and planned to buy them at that sale, getting refitted and starting from scratch. This year, I will buy a racer-back one and a black one, both of which I desperately need AND I WILL NOT BE MADE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.
Chris: But . . .
Me: YES?
Chris: Um, I was just trying to push your buttons. To get a rise out of you. For the fun of it.
Me: . . . . Oh.
It's a cliché---women shopping and men not liking it. As I've pointed out to Chris, he tends to lump what I spend on Charlotte, Lorelei, and myself as just ME, which he has admitted. And that's really not fair! Chris gets the Nordstrom bill and, predictably, exclaims at the total. (Just wait until he gets this month's.) I have to point out that two children had feet that grew, a niece had a birthday, and, sure, Mommy got a new sundress. And, yes, I'll spend $50 on Merrell shoes for Charlotte because they LAST better than any other brand. Ditto for the girls' winter coats, which they wear every single day during the cold months. Charlotte's North Face coats (one in each size!) have been worn hundreds of times and washed dozens of times, and they look brand new when they're handed down to Lorelei. If you buy one at the anniversary price a couple months ahead of when you actually need it? It's a good freaking investment for one coat and two children.
I'm not stupid, though. Do the girls NEED a trillion knit dresses? No. Do I love giving them (especially Charlotte, whose world lights up if a dress has a good twirl) clothes I know they'll love? Of course. I think I bought Charlotte only two pairs of new shorts this summer, because all she wants to wear are dresses.
So, yes, I went zero to sixty (it's hereditary--ask my mom) with Chris yesterday. After all, he's just the same size, more or less, day in and day out. My body has seen A LOT in the past 5 years. I feel like I've finally reached the plateau of my overall size---it hasn't changed much in the past year.
So, you know what? I wanted to shop. Sue me. (Except don't, because then I won't have any moolah to shop with.)
I was successful. Mommy got jeans, booties, and, erm, undergarments. Charlotte got a winter coat and rain boots. Chris got one of his overpriced Tommy John undershirts that he lurvs. Lorelei didn't get squat, poor girl.
Huh. I didn't realize that until now. Well, Lorelei, maybe we'll have to fix that . . . .
This was my conversation with Chris yesterday:
Me: The early-access Nordstrom Anniversary Sale starts in 7 hours!
Chris [groaning]: What do you need to shop for?
Me: Um, booties, for starters, because apparently that trend is sticking around.
Chris: But you HAVE a nice booty.
Me: Har har. And jeans. I need jeans.
Chris: Don't you already HAVE jeans?
[I glare coldly at his uncomprehending face.]
Me: Yes. I do. I have lots of jeans. I also have had two children in the past 5 years, and my waist and ass have swelled and shrunk and swelled and shrunk, hitting many sizes in between, during which I bought cheapo temporary jeans so I could, like, be fully dressed and stuff. Now that I am DONE having your children, I'm feeling pretty confident that I can invest in a nice pair of jeans without the risk of them not fitting next year.
Chris: ---
Me: Furthermore, the last time I bought a NICE [read: potentially overpriced] pair of jeans was 3 years ago, when I was back to my normal size, in between creating Charlotte and Lorelei.
Chris: ---
Me: Also, the jeans I wear very, very often? They're from high school. HIGH. SCHOOL. Which, best case scenario, was 15 years ago. Alas, they're getting a little thin, which one would expect from 15+ years of wear, and the hems are totally frayed.
Chris: ---
Me: Now, shall we count YOUR jeans? Hmmm?
Chris: Um, no. That's okay.
Me: So, then. Seeing as how the last GOOD jeans I bought occurred 3 years ago at the anniversary sale, I'm feeling pretty darn justified in buying new ones for $60 off. I PLAN for this sale, mister.
Chris: But . . .
Me: And bras. I have been scraping by for a year, because you could not believe the cost of three new ones AT THE ANNIVERSARY PRICES last year, when I had finished nursing Lorelei and did not own a single one that fit. NOT ONE. And I had waited and planned to buy them at that sale, getting refitted and starting from scratch. This year, I will buy a racer-back one and a black one, both of which I desperately need AND I WILL NOT BE MADE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.
Chris: But . . .
Me: YES?
Chris: Um, I was just trying to push your buttons. To get a rise out of you. For the fun of it.
Me: . . . . Oh.
It's a cliché---women shopping and men not liking it. As I've pointed out to Chris, he tends to lump what I spend on Charlotte, Lorelei, and myself as just ME, which he has admitted. And that's really not fair! Chris gets the Nordstrom bill and, predictably, exclaims at the total. (Just wait until he gets this month's.) I have to point out that two children had feet that grew, a niece had a birthday, and, sure, Mommy got a new sundress. And, yes, I'll spend $50 on Merrell shoes for Charlotte because they LAST better than any other brand. Ditto for the girls' winter coats, which they wear every single day during the cold months. Charlotte's North Face coats (one in each size!) have been worn hundreds of times and washed dozens of times, and they look brand new when they're handed down to Lorelei. If you buy one at the anniversary price a couple months ahead of when you actually need it? It's a good freaking investment for one coat and two children.
I'm not stupid, though. Do the girls NEED a trillion knit dresses? No. Do I love giving them (especially Charlotte, whose world lights up if a dress has a good twirl) clothes I know they'll love? Of course. I think I bought Charlotte only two pairs of new shorts this summer, because all she wants to wear are dresses.
So, yes, I went zero to sixty (it's hereditary--ask my mom) with Chris yesterday. After all, he's just the same size, more or less, day in and day out. My body has seen A LOT in the past 5 years. I feel like I've finally reached the plateau of my overall size---it hasn't changed much in the past year.
So, you know what? I wanted to shop. Sue me. (Except don't, because then I won't have any moolah to shop with.)
I was successful. Mommy got jeans, booties, and, erm, undergarments. Charlotte got a winter coat and rain boots. Chris got one of his overpriced Tommy John undershirts that he lurvs. Lorelei didn't get squat, poor girl.
Huh. I didn't realize that until now. Well, Lorelei, maybe we'll have to fix that . . . .
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