Getting Ready
I feel like I should say we've been in a whirlwind, preparing to send off Charlotte to her first day of kindergarten. But, um, there's nothing left to do. Except label her scissors and lunchbox.
She is registered at the elementary school. Her shots are up to date. She has new shoes and a first-day outfit picked out. We have the bus schedule.
We've hired a part-time nanny for a couple days per week handle after-school care when I'm in the office. The person we hired is uber qualified and wonderful. I joke that she's more qualified to watch our kids than I am. Emma liked her, too.
Charlotte's last day of preschool is on Thursday. I kept waiting for that wave of HOLY CRAP, MY BABY IS GOING TO KINDERGARTEN! But I've only gotten little snippets, like when the class lists were posted and Charlotte found out who her teacher was, or printing off the class supply list and going to Target for crayons, glue sticks, and a pencil box.
And then? And then it hit me last night. Oh, dear. Instigated by an issue at preschool (with only a few days left--seriously?!), I got emotionally steamrolled by the suddenly oh so clear vulnerability of my precious Charlotte. By 10:00 p.m., I had gotten the issue handled with the director and expected to be able to sleep after all . . . . but I pretty much dissolved into a blubbery mess.
As I checked on Charlotte before heading to bed myself, I couldn't help but lay down next to her. My beautiful girl! ("Inside AND out!" as she'd say.) And the cascade of tears launched.
Chris patiently acknowledged that I was probably a bit emotionally, um, sensitive after the problem at preschool. The two--Charlotte's vulnerability plus the milestone of starting kindergarten--had collided, making me want to create a bunker in the backyard and homeschool . . . FOREVER. The thing was, Charlotte had needed me. I mean, people, she had really needed me. And yay, I was tuned in and able to get to the root of and problem she had and effing FIX it (this one needed a grown-up's intervention, thankyouverymuch). But what if I somehow miss the next issue?
My girl was upset. "How did it make you feel inside?" I asked.
"Scared," she said. (I ask you, is there any more heartbreaking response your young child can give you?) "And bad," she added.
Charlotte was on top of me, in my arms and clinging. "Charlotte, whenever you feel scared or bad inside, you can always, ALWAYS tell Daddy or me. We want to know. Always talk to us, so we can help you. I'm glad you told me."
Friends, I felt her little angst-filled body slacken in relief. And just as quickly, she tightly wrapped her arms around my neck and said, "I love you, Mommy," more sincerely than I've ever heard her in my life.
And so the reality of her sudden and impending exposure to the world hit home. Naturally, I cried my little mommy heart out. It's the prerogative of the kindergarten mother the week before school starts.
In the meantime, I'm taking a vacation day on Friday to spend some time with Charlotte and handle the last few school-starting items: haircut for our girl, meet-your-teacher event at school, routine run-through with the new nanny. And then it will be Monday.
(Hang on. Need another kleenex.)
Okay, enough of that. What are we reading? Well, Charlotte has wanted a break from chapter books, so we've been re-reading some favorites, like Mercy Watson, Grimm fairy tales (books my mom sent from when I was a wee lass), Pigeon Needs a Bath, and Amelia Bedelia.
Me, I've been reading Mrs. Emerson's Wife, a historical novel about Ralph Waldo Emerson's (you guessed it) wife. It's quite good so far and extremely enjoyable. I love good historical fiction.
I'm also reading Antarctica, a collection of stories by the Irish Claire Keegan. The stories are fantastic and delivering in every sort of way. Definitely recommended.
And, as you may recognize from the photo, I'm reading The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. Seeing as how I adore tidiness and detest clutter, the KonMarie method for revamping my household appeals to me greatly. I could write a whole post on it. Maybe I will! But for now, let's just say that I got rid so much stuff this past weekend, I could barely close the trunk on our SUV to drive it away. And I'm somebody who purges stuff regularly! Anyhoo, I think there is a great amount of truth in Kondo's little book.
Finally, I'm listening to Adam Beade by George Eliot as an audiobook. Eliot has sucked me into Beade's pastoral world, though driving through an agricultural reserve early in the morning while listening to the story doesn't hurt.
She is registered at the elementary school. Her shots are up to date. She has new shoes and a first-day outfit picked out. We have the bus schedule.
We've hired a part-time nanny for a couple days per week handle after-school care when I'm in the office. The person we hired is uber qualified and wonderful. I joke that she's more qualified to watch our kids than I am. Emma liked her, too.
Charlotte's last day of preschool is on Thursday. I kept waiting for that wave of HOLY CRAP, MY BABY IS GOING TO KINDERGARTEN! But I've only gotten little snippets, like when the class lists were posted and Charlotte found out who her teacher was, or printing off the class supply list and going to Target for crayons, glue sticks, and a pencil box.
And then? And then it hit me last night. Oh, dear. Instigated by an issue at preschool (with only a few days left--seriously?!), I got emotionally steamrolled by the suddenly oh so clear vulnerability of my precious Charlotte. By 10:00 p.m., I had gotten the issue handled with the director and expected to be able to sleep after all . . . . but I pretty much dissolved into a blubbery mess.
As I checked on Charlotte before heading to bed myself, I couldn't help but lay down next to her. My beautiful girl! ("Inside AND out!" as she'd say.) And the cascade of tears launched.
Chris patiently acknowledged that I was probably a bit emotionally, um, sensitive after the problem at preschool. The two--Charlotte's vulnerability plus the milestone of starting kindergarten--had collided, making me want to create a bunker in the backyard and homeschool . . . FOREVER. The thing was, Charlotte had needed me. I mean, people, she had really needed me. And yay, I was tuned in and able to get to the root of and problem she had and effing FIX it (this one needed a grown-up's intervention, thankyouverymuch). But what if I somehow miss the next issue?
My girl was upset. "How did it make you feel inside?" I asked.
"Scared," she said. (I ask you, is there any more heartbreaking response your young child can give you?) "And bad," she added.
Charlotte was on top of me, in my arms and clinging. "Charlotte, whenever you feel scared or bad inside, you can always, ALWAYS tell Daddy or me. We want to know. Always talk to us, so we can help you. I'm glad you told me."
Friends, I felt her little angst-filled body slacken in relief. And just as quickly, she tightly wrapped her arms around my neck and said, "I love you, Mommy," more sincerely than I've ever heard her in my life.
And so the reality of her sudden and impending exposure to the world hit home. Naturally, I cried my little mommy heart out. It's the prerogative of the kindergarten mother the week before school starts.
In the meantime, I'm taking a vacation day on Friday to spend some time with Charlotte and handle the last few school-starting items: haircut for our girl, meet-your-teacher event at school, routine run-through with the new nanny. And then it will be Monday.
(Hang on. Need another kleenex.)
Okay, enough of that. What are we reading? Well, Charlotte has wanted a break from chapter books, so we've been re-reading some favorites, like Mercy Watson, Grimm fairy tales (books my mom sent from when I was a wee lass), Pigeon Needs a Bath, and Amelia Bedelia.
Me, I've been reading Mrs. Emerson's Wife, a historical novel about Ralph Waldo Emerson's (you guessed it) wife. It's quite good so far and extremely enjoyable. I love good historical fiction.
I'm also reading Antarctica, a collection of stories by the Irish Claire Keegan. The stories are fantastic and delivering in every sort of way. Definitely recommended.
And, as you may recognize from the photo, I'm reading The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. Seeing as how I adore tidiness and detest clutter, the KonMarie method for revamping my household appeals to me greatly. I could write a whole post on it. Maybe I will! But for now, let's just say that I got rid so much stuff this past weekend, I could barely close the trunk on our SUV to drive it away. And I'm somebody who purges stuff regularly! Anyhoo, I think there is a great amount of truth in Kondo's little book.
Finally, I'm listening to Adam Beade by George Eliot as an audiobook. Eliot has sucked me into Beade's pastoral world, though driving through an agricultural reserve early in the morning while listening to the story doesn't hurt.
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