3 Years!

November 17, 2007. (Always a wedding photo on 11/17!)

"And that," I said, crawling back into bed after putting Charlotte back down in the wee hours of this morning, "was your anniversary present."

Yes, at 3:30 a.m. on this, the morning of November 17, our darling daughter decided to mark the special day by wriggling out from under her cozy blankets, turning 180 degrees in her crib, and crying bloody murder because she was cold. In other words, she decided to highlight how much our lives have changed since our wedding day 3 years ago.

I rocked Charlotte under some blankets, hoping to get her toasty warm and drowsy so she'd go back to sleep. Well, she preferred to bounce and play in my lap, which resulted in her accidentally smacking her face into my collar bone. So she cried. And she was tired, so after about 30 seconds, she became hysterical and I'm certain no longer had a clue what she was crying about. A diaper change and bottle later, I returned to bed at 4:05 a.m. I realized my alarm would go off (it's set to go off at 5:10 a.m.) right around the time I managed to doze off, and there's nothing worse than that I'm-dead-tired-but-my-alarm-is-shrieking-and-I-have-to-get-ready-for-work feeling.

So I got up again, made coffee, and here I am, contemplating year 3 of marriage.

When I married Chris, I knew he'd make a great dad. That was a major reason why I chose him to wed. We both wanted kids, whether they would share our DNA or were adopted, and obviously Charlotte entered our lives this year. I have loved watching Chris take on his role as dad.

I suppose your first baby strengthens a marriage in some ways and tests it in others. We're connected to each other by Charlotte. Not just by Charlotte--I mean, this girl arrived only this year. She's obviously a physical manifestation of Chris and me, but more relevant is that she is the #1 priority for both of us, no question. We're in this whole raising-Charlotte thing together.

And, as you can imagine, your first baby tests aspects of your marriage. Sleep deprivation, juggling work, scheduling weekends and outings around naps, remembering diaper bags, diverting money to 529 funds and daycare tuition instead of fun stuff, and so on. Plus there's the sheer work the kiddo requires. And the fact that you don't really know what you're doing. So, a lot of newness gets thrown at you at once. Division of labor has to get re-divided. Communication must work. And if you lose your sense of humor or the ability to make your spouse laugh and laugh, you're screwed.

This year, instead of hiring a babysitter and (gasp!) going out, we celebrated on Saturday with a one of my favorite dinners (made by Chris) and a very nice bottle of wine. Tonight, Chris will cook some steaks instead of the standby frozen pizza that is our typical weeknight fare. And because I've been up since 3:30, I just may fall asleep during dinner.

A challenging but amazing third year. I wouldn't want to be on this crazy ride with anybody else!